Do You See What I See?

Take a moment to look around you. Can you see the uptick in people asking for a handout? Can you see the homeless camps popping up faster than spring flowers? Are you present to the world in front of you?

I try to look the other way. I think I need to wait. Truth is, there is no better time to be numbered among those who give now. This is your moment. According to Elaine Marshall, our NC Secretary of State, North Carolina charitable donations are down by about $10.8 million. Will you lean in and give?

The Cary Women’s Giving Network helps me ensure that the money I give goes to groups in the Cary area who are making an impact. We meet regularly to hear the needs of nonprofits and then open up the grant applications to organizations who need support. I am proud to be serve as the co- chair of this year’s committee who will be reviewing the applicants and making recommendations to our group.

Over the years, the Giving Network has given more than $150,000 to nonprofits including many of the ones listed below. Applications open March 4 and close at noon on April 5, 2022.

Let me know if you want to join the Cary Women’s Giving Network and be a part of this group that will distribute funds in June. If you want to help now, consider one of these wonderful nonprofits.

If you have a worthy organization to add to this list, please put in the comment section below.

North Carolina Nonprofits

Homeless

Durham Rescue Mission serves men, women, and children of Durham, Chapel Hill, and Raleigh offering solution to homelessness and addiction that goes beyond just meeting basic needs.

Families Together helps families in Wake County and surrounding areas find stable housing and connects to community resources.

Green Chair Project offers gently used home furnishings for families recovering from homelessness, crisis, or disaster.

Habitat for Humanity partners with the community to build safe, affordable homes with local families.

Haven House operates 11 youth programs, including Wrenn House, the only  emergency shelter for youth ages 1- to 17 in the Triangle.

Note-In The Pocket helps homeless and poor children have the clothes they need.

Raleigh Rescue Mission  serves those experiencing homelessness in our community through the love of Christ with a focus on assisting those who are ready to make a commitment to transforming their life, and working to overcome the negative factors that led to homelessness.

Carying Place “Our goal is to help working homeless families achieve independent living through mentoring of volunteers providing weekly guidance in managing personal finances, seeking permanent affordable housing, and maintaining a job – breaking the cycle of poverty they have experienced.”

Food Insecurity

A Place at the Table  provides community and good food for all regardless of means.

Dorcas provides a pantry where people in need can shop for groceries at no cost.

Food Bank of Eastern and Central North Carolina collects donations, dry and shelf-stable foods.

Inter-Faith Food Shuttle feeds our neighbors, teaches self-sufficiency, grows healthy foods, and cultivates innovative approaches to end hunger.

Meals on Wheels serves meals to homebound older adults and people with disabilities.

North Raleigh Ministries provides a pantry where people in need can shop for groceries at no cost.

Shepherd’s Table Soup Kitchen provides food obtained by donation and served by volunteers.

TABLE provides hunger relief and nutrition education services to children living in Orange County, North Carolina.

Nonprofits who offer emergency service

Activate Good helps recruit and connect volunteers to fulfill volunteer needs with hundreds of Community Partners around the Triangle.

Antioch Builds Community offers a wide variety of programs to help identify needs in the Durham community and respond with compassion through collaboration, support, and education.

Bridge the Gap dedicated to improving the quality of life for low-income and disadvantaged individuals and families by helping to provide for their immediate needs.

Dorcas provides Cary residents emergency assistance including shelter, clothing, food, fuel, transportation, medical care, childcare and education.

Lutheran Family Services helps refugees and immigrants with housing, health screenings, and school enrollment.

SAFEchild is working to increase child safety, prevent child abuse, bullying, and interpersonal violence.

Urban Ministries of Wake and Durham County serves neighbors experiencing crisis or poverty with food, healthcare, medicine and shelter.

Salvation Army has served Wake County since 1887. We provide food for the hungry, companionship to the elderly and ill, clothing and shelter to the homeless, opportunities for underprivileged children, relief for disaster victims, assistance for the disabled, and many more services to those in need.

The Politics of Work

My favorite co-worker greeted me warmly every morning, liked to go for walks at lunch, and often took naps in the afternoon. She also had a tail and four legs. When this adorably puppy stopped coming to work, the atmosphere of the office shifted and I started to notice more politics.

While, it may not be easy to add a dog to your workplace, you can make changes.  A good book to help is the “Millennials’ Guide to Workplace Politics: What No One Ever Told You About Power and Influence” by Mira Brancu and Jennifer Wisdom.

The book is broken into proactive strategies with tools to build a network of support and reactive strategies to try before you make a move. Often, the grass is not greener at another workplace – it’s just different players in the field.

If you are ready for a change. Start with yourself. Here are some of the basic rules to consider:

  1. Never say anything bad about anyone at work to anyone at work. Save your venting when you are at home or with friends.
  2. Write emails and messages as if they will be shared on social media or forwarded to others including the person you are talking about.
  3. Be honest with everyone, including yourself.
  4. Be patient. There may be times a person is working or your behalf to make things better and you don’t even know about it.
  5. Be curious about your abilities and look for opportunities to improve.
  6. Remember to be kind always. You don’t know what someone else is going through.
  7. Practice healthy skepticism. Not everything can be taken at face-value.
  8. Stop judging. Observe and clarify your own boundaries, not others.

You can do this. Be a force for good. Find your strength, find your people, and make it happen! Got tips to share? Please add them to the comment section below.

The Creep at Work

No, not the kind of “creep” at work that needs to be reported to the police. This is the creep that happens on Mondays when a conversation between your work life and your home life gets blurry.

You can restore the boundaries when you visualize your time as a garden that needs to be nurtured and protected. Gardens have physical boundaries that stop the creep of weeds. You can do the same at work. Consider these tips:

  1. Ensure meetings have agendas. There should be a beginning and end time with key speakers and topics noted. Appoint a timekeeper who gives a signal when the meeting is 10 minutes from being over. This allows time for final thoughts and takeaways.
  2. Along with an agenda, there should be an overarching goal or project-base for the meetings. You can do away with “status” meeting with emails. If something on the project is going off-track, then you can call a meeting to redefine goals.
  3. Set clear responsibilities in the group. Know what your job is and do it. Turn down requests that aren’t in your scope.
  4. Take control of emails by scheduling a time to respond to them and be sure to unsubscribe from email list servers that aren’t productive.
  5. Unplug from work. This may mean setting the time aside to check-in if there’s a big project brewing and letting the rest go to when you are back “on” at the office.
  6. Don’t overdo the overtime. Prioritize projects by learning the ebb and flow of your industry.

Mental and emotional boundaries are a little more complicated to set. Consider the following ideas to protect yourself from burn out or finding yourself in an uncomfortable situation:

  1. Focus on the person in front of you. You can save time by listening to what they want and responding. In return, you can expect them to respect your time in the same way.
  2. Take a break. This can look like a walk around the block or can be a vacation where you can completely unplug.
  3. Don’t blur lines between professional relationships and friendships. It helps to keep the conversation work-based and may mean redirecting a conversation that edges off-topic or in the weeds with gossip.
  4. Be respectful, but resolute. If you aren’t comfortable with handshakes and hugs, offer a smile and elbow tap.
  5. Value your time. Think of what your hourly rate is – or should be – and then ask for that when others demand your time in the off-hours.

Boundaries establish who are and, in some cases, where you begin and others end. They don’t have to be concrete walls. Our boundaries can be permeable enough to allow the good in, while protecting us from the danger of burn-out or damage to our overall wellbeing.

What are your ideas to stop the creep at work? Please add them to the comment section.

Reduce, Refresh, Recycle: Top Three Ways to Improve your Online Presence

It’s a new year and time to think about making your online presence the best it can be. Here are the top three ways to make an impact. Make it to the end of this blog and you win a free prize!

Reduce your online presence by deleting old accounts and unsubscribing to lists that aren’t helpful. If you are unsure how to delete an old account, visit justdelete.me. Don’t forget to delete old e-mails. After 180 days, emails stored on a web server are considered abandoned and can be accessed without a warrant (Electronic Communications Privacy Act of 1986). You can also delete old social media posts on Facebook and Instagram. For Twitter, go to tweetdelete. Keep your searches private by using duckduckgo.com. This search engine doesn’t track your searches and link them to you, eliminating targeted ads and search results that you don’t want.

Refresh your passwords. It’s inevitable that there will be a breach of records that may impact your username and email. A few years back, Equifax had a leak that provided access to their database with 147 million Americans. The best practice is to update your passwords every so often.

If you think you are pretty good at the password protection game, think again. Tap your email into haveibeenpwned.com to see where the leaks are. I discovered in 2021 LinkedIn was attacked. The scraped data contains approximately 400M records with 125M unique email addresses, as well as names, geographic locations, genders and job titles.

Keep track of the passwords through a password manager. I use Password Corral. It’s a free download to your computer and easy to use. All of your passwords are stored into a database that’s protected with a single master password – the only one you’ll need to remember from now on. This database is encrypted for an extra layer of security.

Recycle content is an easy way to grow influence. This blog is a great example. It’s posted on the frscommunications.com website and shared through social media sites. It is planned for upcoming webinars too.

In celebration of two years in business we are offering a free 30-minute consultation. Put a note in the comment section to claim your free offer today. Make 2022 your year of working smarter, not harder!

Book Launch: “A Special Light” written by Allison Aldridge Forrester features NC Crystal Coast illustrations

“A Special Light,” is perfect for preschool and early elementary kids. The story is about Ella, the egret, and her new friend as they spend time on the Bogue Sound shoreline. This delightful Christian children’s book includes illustrations from award winning artist Cinzia Battistel.  

Open to the public book launch for “A Special Light” by Allison Forrester will be held on November 6 from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. at Fest in the West, an outdoor festival at the USA Baseball National Training Complex located in western Cary, North Carolina, off of Green Hope School Road. More about Fest in the West => https://festinthewest.com.

The story of the egret and her friend the heron takes you along the shoreline teaching the values from the Fruit of the Spirit. It’s one of my favorites! Liza Weidle, CEO and Gigi to 7 grandchildren

This book is a keeper if you’re a grandparent, a parent or just a friend to share its beautiful love story about our Bogue Banks coastline. Sheila Ogle, Entrepreneur and owner of Cary Pink House

Allison Forrester, author of “A Special Light,”is a graduate of Duke University with an AB in elementary education. She holds a Masters degree in Special Education from the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill, and she received a Certificate in School Management and Leadership from Harvard Business School.

​As an educator, community leader and mother of three sons, her constant goal is to stimulate one’s imagination and to be a beacon of God’s light. Her desire is to impress upon her children and others the value of His astonishing miracles and Love. Being afforded the fortunate opportunity to spend additional time on the Outer Banks during the COVID pandemic, Allison has chosen to share this sanctuary with her family and first-born granddaughter. “A Special Light” is Allison’s first book.

Cinzia Battistel, “A Special Light”artist, was born in Milan in 1963. You can find the colors of the Italian landscapes in all her artwork, whether in her watercolors, pastels, or digital paintings. Author and illustrator, for TV animation series and books, her illustrations appear in advertising, magazines, books, newspapers and animation. ​Cinzia was several times awarded by the Annual of Italian Illustrations. Nature and Art, are the best inspirations of her naturalistic illustrated books.

​

2021 • HB ISBN: 978-1-7366603-0-0 • LCCN: 2021905399

JUVENILE FICTION / Religious / Christian / Early Reader

Book Size: 8″ x 10″ • Page Count: 24 • Book Price: HB $14.99 U.S.

Published by Wisdom House Books: www.wisdomhousebooks.com/a-special-light

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Authors Corner at Fest in the West

Fest in the West is back and better than ever! Please join FRS Communications as we host an Authors Corner featuring Allison Forrester, Amanda Lamb, and Sheila Ogle.

Come on down for the children’s story time at 10 a.m. with Sheila Ogle reading from “The Pink House.” Our dear friend Allison Forrester will read from ” A Special Light Book” that’s great for preschool and elementary kids and published by Wisdom House Books. Plus hear our dear friend WRAL Amanda Lamb reading from “We are not the Same and that’s OK.” These books and a few others will be available at the FRS Communications booth.

IH Creative will have custom book totes and masks available for sale.

Be sure to join us at noon for a birthday party for Sheila – pink sugar frosted cake included!

I am the #Unjabbed

Nowhere in the “How to be Safe” manual does it say you can discriminate against someone because of their medical conditions. Yet, here we are, jobs being lost, and feeling at war with one another.

I grew weary of being interrogated about my C-jab status, talking about my medical conditions, and hearing the lectures on why I should find another doctor who could fix my medical conditions so that I could be jabbed. When some of my job perks were taken away, I finally resigned.

I am fortunate that I have other revenue streams that allow me to make money through my business. Others who can’t take the C-jab may not have the option to just walk away from a job.

It is for my fellow friends and family who are also unjabbed that I am taking a stand and telling my story. And to be clear, I am not against jabs. I just had the flu jab and TDAP. The C-jab is one that is unsafe for me.

If you need help telling your story, send me a message or drop it in the comment section below and I will add to the next blog.

Grace, peace, and love to you!

A Friend in the Forest

The sun seems to shine the brightest through the branches of this beautiful tree. Her mighty trunk divides a few feet up into three very strong trunks and there is a little bit of a clearing around her, making it a perfect place for a picnic. It was at this moment of discovery that I knew we needed to buy the tree farm where she lives. I made a tree friend and had to keep coming back to see Caroline. Yes, I named the tree. And, right again. There must be thousands of trees, why this tree? And, I think, “Why not?” She has stood for generations waiting to be discovered. I visit her as often as I can to marvel at her strength, her steadiness, and to help pull a few dead branches from the crook in her trunk.

Have you ever had a tree friend? Have you ever thought about how trees are a little like friends? In the book “Higher is Waiting” by Tyler Perry , you can read about Tyler’s Tree of Life test. It makes sense. Here’s how Tyler describes the three types of people you have in your life.

First there are the Leaf People. These folks are in your life only for a season. You can’t depend on them or count on them because they have weaknesses of their own and are only able to offer shade. Like leaves, they take what they need and as soon as it gets cold, or a fierce wind blows, or the rain comes, they’re gone. You can’t be angry with them, it’s just who they are.

Next there are the Branch People. They are stronger than the Leaf People, but they need care. They may stick around from one season to the next, but if a storm rolls through, it’s possible they’ll break apart and you’ll lose them,  It’s important to test their strength before you can rely on them. It really depends on how long they’ve been growing with you. If it’s been a while, they’ve probably gained strength with time. New branches may not be able to handle too much heaviness. They can split when the going gets tough, it’s just who they are.

Then there are Root People. When you find someone who is like the roots of a tree, you know you found someone special. Root People may be hard to find because they’re not trying to be seen. They do their work underground. But quietly and without fanfare, they provide help and support and nourishment. They are happy when you thrive. Come what may, they support your soul. They hold your soul up. A tree may have many more branches and many leaves and only a few roots, yet it is the roots that are strong, resilient, and powerful.

I am thankful for the Root People in my world and if you are reading this, I am pretty sure you are one of them – thank you!

“A Pastor’s Heart”

Take a step back in time with Katharine Wool Parrish’s latest book that tells the story of leaders from two very different pastorates in the American South. “A Pastor’s Heart” is a fictional story drawn from the lives of real people very dear to Katherine and that love shows on every page of this charming book. Purchase the book today on Amazon or by emailing Katharine.

A Pastor’s Heart begins with the story of Jim’s father, a Presbyterian pastor in Virginia and North Carolina. His mother’s prayer for a son “with a pastor’s heart” was granted, just before her death, in 1901, when he was born. Written as fiction (names changed) based on the known facts about Jim’s family, background and ministry, the book honors his faith and calling. From a small pastorate in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia, to pastorates and church courts served in Alabama, West Virginia and South Carolina, the story honors the family life, trials and victorious faith of an ordinary man endowed with a pastor’s heart.

Listen in as Katharine tells more about her life and why she wrote “A Pastor’s Heart.”

About Katharine Wool Parrish:

Katharine has published five books and over a hundred articles. She grew up in the beautiful mountains of West Virginia and is a Cary High School graduate. Katharine’s articles have appeared in OUR STATE Magazine, GUIDEPOSTS, THE CARY NEWS, MATURE LIVING, CHRISTIAN HOME, HOME LIFE, MATURE YEARS and numerous publications, as well as two anthologies. She has earned awards from Tar Heel Writers’ Roundtable, Blue Ridge Christians Writers’ and Florida Christian Writers’ Conference for poetry, short stories and articles. Katharine also taught writing for several years at Cary Christian School, the Town of Cary Arts and History Center as well as weekly writing classes for home school students in Cary.

Katharine taught Sunday School and Women’s Bible studies while writing her first book, Dustmop Devotionals, a devotional for women. Here is more information on three of Katharine’s books:  

Time of Singing: A Collection of Poems is a collection that includes some of Katharine’s thoughts on God’s love, mercy, grace, creation and majesty, the family, motherhood, grief and even some entertaining poems she calls “Nonsense Songs”.

Ready or Not: Surviving Grief, Living Abundantly  is a “been-there” guide to surviving the devastation of grief. Through this book, Katharine offers true sympathy, practical help and encouragement toward the promise of healing and new life. Presented in a devotional format, the book uses personal stories, applicable Scripture and the sound advice of trained counselors to offer understanding and a sense of accountability to the newly bereaved. 

Anna Kate and the Secret Treasure is written for 3rd graders and in this book that includes hand drawings, Katharine tells the story of Anna Kate who unearths a treasured family heirloom and learns its hundred-year-old story, she discovers the meaning of faith and family.